There is nothing more beautiful to hear then two words that should complete each other. When you hear the word missing, your heart longs to hear the word found. Gratefully, I can write the next post about the happier of the two topics: Found!!!
Here is what happened: Not more than a hour after posting the story of my missing glasses, my roommate came home and we began talking about the extremely important topic of my glasses. I know some people talk about politics, the economy, and global warming, not in our house. We deal with the hard hitting issues like missing glasses. Well I was just explaining to her my whole predicament (which she had heard everyday for two weeks) when I ran the construction worker, monkey theory by her. I explained that not only were my glasses missing, but my eyeliner, and ipod case. No sooner had I mentioned this, then she looked at me seriously and said, "You know I was just talking to a lady at work about this very thing. She had all of these random things missing, and when she went up into her attic she found a pack rat. A real live pack rat had been hiding her things." I just stared at her with my mouth agape. Now if you know anything about me, you know you do not mention actual people having creatures in their homes stealing things. We both looked at each other and laughed. "There is no way a pack rat is taking my things. It's just not possible." I laughed again, but only half heartedly, because my imagination was already getting carried away. "Dang it! Now I'm going to have to look, because you know I won't be able to sleep tonight." I told my roommate. And so I grabbed a chair and headed up to my room. My roommate graciously said she would come a running if she heard me scream. I set the chair below the attic opening, cautiously stood on the chair, reached up and stretched my arms out as long as they could go. . . . . . and I couldn't even reach the top. ( I was in line at a restaurant a couple of weeks ago, when a man turned around and said to his wife, "Look Chris I finally found someone as short as you." His wife then said, "Can I shake your hand." I thought the man was being ridiculous, because I'm not that short, but then again, I couldn't even touch the top of the ceiling with a chair. Maybe I'm shrinking.)
Anyway I got a ruler and tried to push at the opening, but it was stuck on too tight. That is when I realized I was being foolish. I got back down and decided to call it a night. I started to put back all of the things that I had moved and just as I was pushing my bed back, my eyes beheld a brown glint of glory. There behind all of the books in my bookshelf (which I swear I had moved) were my beautiful glasses. Yes, they were right under my nose; I guess my vivid imagination got the best of me. However, as I was recounting this story to another friend (yes, as I mentioned it is a hot topic) she told me about a true story where a lady was living in a man's closet in Japan ( for a year) and she would come out while he was at work and eat his food.
Scary, and on that note, I would just like to state that my ipod case is still missing.
3 comments:
You always make me laugh! I love that while looking for the pack rat you found your glasses.
I'm so glad you found them - I was seriously starting to worry though that a packrat had a major part in this story. I'm so relieved that it did not!
Ok ok can I say I love you and I always get a good laugh in when I read you posts. You crack me up!! I think you should seriously consider writing for the NY Times or some other paper. I would read you column daily. Love ya and I am so sorry I forgot to call on you Birthday!! Happy Late Birthday Tiff!! YOu are Beautiful, Fantastic and Amazing oh and Super FUnny!!
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