The Life of a Celebrity

If you have ever wanted to be a celebrity, I highly recommend becoming a teacher. It is true, suddenly, everyone in the whole community knows you and all about you. (Okay, money wise teaching is nothing like being a celebrity, but fame, oh the fame) Seriously, kids watch you, copy you, and tell their families about everything you do, everything you wear, and everything you say. Trust me I know, I'm a teacher. Even normal, seemingly random things that you don't ever think about, suddenly are the latest rage. For example, just the other day one of my students commented, "Miss R, I just love the way you point." "I'm sorry, what?" I replied. "You know, the way you point. It's so cool." She gushed. Uh. . . .soon after, everyone was practicing the way I point. Craziness, I've even started to have emphathy (well kind of) for the scrutinity of real celebrities. You see last year I moved close by my school. Now not only do kids watch my every move at school, but every store I go to I hear voices calling, "Miss R, Oh my gosh there she is. Look she's buying candy. Look her hair is in pigtails." It's a little much, and so I sometimes find myself driving farther away to avoid run ins. (It's just like those horrible pictures of celebrities in the tabloids. You never know when you are going to see someone you taught.)
Well to add to this craziness, somehow I found myself out with another celebrity, Mr. Favorite Middle School Teacher. It all seemed pretty harmless and fun at first. However, for some reason I didn't realize that this was much bigger than us. Soon, I found my inbox full of emails from former students, I was attacked daily by Middle Schoolers in search of gossip, my boards were filled with mushy notes from former students, and somehow parents and faculty started pulling me aside with sly winks. One parent who had a student in my class this year and last, popped in one afternoon, "Now I really need to talk to you about Paul, but first let's talk about more important things like Mr. Celebrity." "Ummm. . ." I stammered. "Yep, those girls found out where you guys were going for dinner the other night, and they wanted us to drive them there. Of course, I told them they would never get a table and they said, "Oh we don't want a table, we just want to look in through the windows." I stared. "Ummmm. . . . " "Now don't you worry, we didn't take them, but I just wanted to tell you how big this is." "Ummm. . . " And so, suddenly, there was a lot of pressure for this to work out. (Poor celebrites) It continued with girls wanting to become my bridesmaids, and Valentines given to me with our initails on them. Did I mention that somehow this got out of control?
A few weeks later, at parent teacher conferences, just as I was beginning to talk with my next student, a former mother rushed in."Sorry, sorry for interrupting but I just had to come in and say, "Oh my goodness!. I'm so excited for you and Mr. Celebrity. He is so cute, and you are so cute. We just love him, and we just love you. I just wanted to tell you everyone at the middle school and elementary loves you guys and talks of nothing else." Mortified, I smiled and in between her gushing, wondered if I should tell her it was over. But then I looked at the hopeful smile of the kids and the excited parents, and I decided I just couldn't crush their hopes. So, I just continued to smile and nod. I decided I'd just let myself go off track, and let things simmer down. Perhaps, I could hire a spokesperson to tell everyone like real celebrities do, and while they're at it they could take my freezing cold winter recess duty. Unfortunately, I'm not sure I could find someone who will work for apples, Tootsie Rolls and hand drawn pictures. And so, if you are thinking of becoming a teacher (celebrity) remember you may never be able to shop at the store without looking over your shoulder again, and your life may be the next big story on the students' tabloid page. However, I must admit, it's worth it for those hand drawn pictures, Tootsie Rolls, apples and your crazy fans, the students.